one week already?

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there, especially my dad & my husband! Marcus is seriously such a great dad and now that we have 2 kids and I see his love for both of them, I admire him even more.

Believe it or not, Selah is one week old today. WHAT. Too fast! This week seriously flew by. It's been so nice having Marcus home to help out and he gets this next week off as well. My mom has also been a huge help coming over to help me clean, watching Ezra while we take Selah to the doctor, etc. She's awesome. 

Life with 2 kids has been quite an adjustment. I had a little scare with Selah throwing up stomach bile after almost every feeding at just 3 days old and not waking up to nurse and I knew she had a weight check appointment on Friday so I was nervous. We took her in on Thursday and she had gained 4 oz from the previous day and we were told her throwing up was nothing to worry about. That eased my mind! Then at her weight check on Friday she had gained another 3 oz from Thursday - 7 oz in 2 days is something her doctor was very happy about! She's done throwing up and she's nursing like a total champ and she is a seriously easy baby - last night she only woke up twice and she only cries for a moment if she's hungry. Otherwise she's just a little cuddle bug.

Ezra is learning to be gentle with her and he likes to kiss her feet while I feed her. She just likes to lounge around with her double chin hanging out. I'm learning to juggle 2 kids and maintaining my house and find balance in it all. I'm a little nervous for when Marcus goes back to work next week, but I have another whole week to get used to having 2 kids! The Lord knows I'll definitely need his help! ;)

I've found myself in prayer a lot more this past week than I have in a long time. When I thought Selah was sick I was constantly praying that she would be okay, that I wouldn't worry and that everything would be fine. Then on Wednesday afternoon, Ezra threw up for the first time in his life and was sick the rest of the day so Marcus stayed home from church with him since he threw up his dinner, too. I didn't know why God was throwing me such a curve ball - a newborn that I worried about and now my 18 month old didn't feel good and I couldn't do anything about it. I was having some serious anxiety and the only thing I knew to do was to look to God. When I think about why my pregnancy was so physically difficult (and mentally) I thought that I would never understand why it had to be that way. I asked Marcus "why me?" just about every day towards the end. I just didn't get why I had to suffer through pregnancy and not be able to enjoy it, why I had to go past my due date when I was so uncomfortable while others welcomed healthy babies one or two weeks early. My tender, loving husband told me there was a reason, and maybe that reason was so that I could help other moms who were struggling and feeling the same way I felt. Maybe I had to go through it to make a difference. Well, the past week has taught me that maybe I've been facing "trials" because I need to remember to rely on God. I know that I can't get through this life alone but I think sometimes I forgot to turn to my Father for help first instead of wondering why things were happening the way they were and feeling sorry for myself.

Things are getting easier and back to normal and I absolutely love having 2 babies to love on!

In case you don't follow me on Instagram, here are some pictures of my adorable little chunk, her adorable little outfits, and my adorable (not-so-little-anymore) Ezra.